One of my best friends from college is coming into town tomorrow! I am so excited to see them. It'll be a blasty blast. She and her husband (!!!) are staying the night for new years eve. So I am super excited for that to occur.
I have more to write, but I don't remember what topic I wanted to bring up. Oh well. :) Most of my stuff in my room is gone/recycled/trashed/donated now, and it's kind of nice to get rid of the clutter. It's beyond ridiculous.
I'm sure I'll blog later tonight. I'm dogsitting for the next two days and the house I'm dogsitting at has wonderful WiFi. Yay blogging!
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
Short Story
Let me apologize first for the inconsistency of posting. I wanted to write every day in December, but the combination of being out of my element and no WiFi, it's been tough producing a post every day. And in addition, I apologize for the following post because it is not the traditional post from me. I had the sudden urge to write a short story, and I'm going to post it here. I hope you like it, and I want to see where your mind takes the story. I know in my mind what occurs for this story to happen, but I'm sure when you first read it, something completely different will come to mind. All feedback is welcome. :)
She couldn't stop staring. Pacing around the room nervously, she found herself fixed upon it again. Waiting for that one call would make or break her evening. 'This is so childish,' she kept reminding herself. Fidgeting, she occupiede her hands by rummaging through pile upon pile of papers in her room. Though her hands were busy, her head kept returning to that one spot in the room.
Suddenly, she picked her head up. Did she hear it? Was that her distinguishable ringtone? The screen remained black. Looking to the phone, she knew her mind was playing tricks on her. She began singing the ringtown to herself, hoping it would somehow nudge the call along. Realizing the idiocy of her thinking, she stopped.
Watching her cell phone was as useless as watching a pot of water boil. She took a deep breath. 'Perhaps I need to leave the room?' she told herself, tiptoe-ing through her doorway. In mid-step, she halted all movement. Did she hear it? Was that her distinguishable ringtone? She looked down to see her feet were frozen, as if not to disturb the phone. She shook her head, knowing again that her mind was being devious. She told herself to stay in the room, just in case.
She imagined her senses were heightened, if only in this moment. Her radio began "Sitting, Waiting, Wishing" by Jack Johnson. She laughed. The world was joking with her. She turned off the radio, attempting to cut out any interference with the eerie silence in the rest of the room. She closed her eyes when a few seconds later, her eyelids popped open. Did she hear it? Was that her distinguishable ringtone/ Again, nothing had changed about the phone's appearance.
She signed, finally accepting the notion that perhaps the call would never end up being made. No connection would ever occur. No conversation will be taking place. Finding the darkest, most desolate corner of the room, she slinked against the wall. For the rest of the night, her last hope rested on that phone call. Her eyelids fell heavy again and as her breathing steadied, a single tear inched down her cheek. She had realized that no call was worse than any conversation that would have taken place.
She couldn't stop staring. Pacing around the room nervously, she found herself fixed upon it again. Waiting for that one call would make or break her evening. 'This is so childish,' she kept reminding herself. Fidgeting, she occupiede her hands by rummaging through pile upon pile of papers in her room. Though her hands were busy, her head kept returning to that one spot in the room.
Suddenly, she picked her head up. Did she hear it? Was that her distinguishable ringtone? The screen remained black. Looking to the phone, she knew her mind was playing tricks on her. She began singing the ringtown to herself, hoping it would somehow nudge the call along. Realizing the idiocy of her thinking, she stopped.
Watching her cell phone was as useless as watching a pot of water boil. She took a deep breath. 'Perhaps I need to leave the room?' she told herself, tiptoe-ing through her doorway. In mid-step, she halted all movement. Did she hear it? Was that her distinguishable ringtone? She looked down to see her feet were frozen, as if not to disturb the phone. She shook her head, knowing again that her mind was being devious. She told herself to stay in the room, just in case.
She imagined her senses were heightened, if only in this moment. Her radio began "Sitting, Waiting, Wishing" by Jack Johnson. She laughed. The world was joking with her. She turned off the radio, attempting to cut out any interference with the eerie silence in the rest of the room. She closed her eyes when a few seconds later, her eyelids popped open. Did she hear it? Was that her distinguishable ringtone/ Again, nothing had changed about the phone's appearance.
She signed, finally accepting the notion that perhaps the call would never end up being made. No connection would ever occur. No conversation will be taking place. Finding the darkest, most desolate corner of the room, she slinked against the wall. For the rest of the night, her last hope rested on that phone call. Her eyelids fell heavy again and as her breathing steadied, a single tear inched down her cheek. She had realized that no call was worse than any conversation that would have taken place.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Starting My Career
Today, I had to go through even more stuff in my room, and I decided to tackle all of the notes/cards/letters/et cetera in my room. Going through the letters reminded me where I've come from and the friends who have helped me along the way in the past. One letter in particular stopped me dead in my tracks when I saw what it was. I looked at the name on the envelope - I recognized the handwriting. It was written by my journalism teacher from high school.
Opening the envelope, I knew exactly what the letter was: It was my acceptance letter onto the high school newspaper staff. I was a freshman in high school when I received the letter one fateful day in the spring. Ever since receiving that letter, it confirmed to me that journalism was the way I wanted to go with my life. It got the ball rolling, and ever since entering my sophomore year, I was part of a news staff. My high school paper was the best environment for me to learn grammar lessons, AP style and how to put a story together. See how I just put a comma after one item, not both, in the previous sentence? That's AP style, and I learned it from my newspaper staff.
The experienced journalists taught me how a newspaper staff should run, and how much dedication it takes to put the paper together. It has helped me succeed in everything journalism-related since.
Finding that letter put me back in that classroom again - the one in which I was handed the letter. The editor-in-chief told me "Congratulations" as she handed it to me, and I was so excited. I owe that staff a lot of my success (which is still exceedingly small, and I know that).
I framed the letter earlier today. It is so important to be thankful for those who created your love for your passion and, in my case, career. Thank you, Mrs. Hiner for harboring my love for writing and fine-tuning my editing skills so that they would aid me in the future. You started it all for me.
(Also, an unrelated thank you to my sister, who reads this often. I'm glad you're checking this and it encourages me to keep writing. I love you, and I'm sad you aren't here for this Christmas. It won't be the same without you.)
Opening the envelope, I knew exactly what the letter was: It was my acceptance letter onto the high school newspaper staff. I was a freshman in high school when I received the letter one fateful day in the spring. Ever since receiving that letter, it confirmed to me that journalism was the way I wanted to go with my life. It got the ball rolling, and ever since entering my sophomore year, I was part of a news staff. My high school paper was the best environment for me to learn grammar lessons, AP style and how to put a story together. See how I just put a comma after one item, not both, in the previous sentence? That's AP style, and I learned it from my newspaper staff.
The experienced journalists taught me how a newspaper staff should run, and how much dedication it takes to put the paper together. It has helped me succeed in everything journalism-related since.
Finding that letter put me back in that classroom again - the one in which I was handed the letter. The editor-in-chief told me "Congratulations" as she handed it to me, and I was so excited. I owe that staff a lot of my success (which is still exceedingly small, and I know that).
I framed the letter earlier today. It is so important to be thankful for those who created your love for your passion and, in my case, career. Thank you, Mrs. Hiner for harboring my love for writing and fine-tuning my editing skills so that they would aid me in the future. You started it all for me.
(Also, an unrelated thank you to my sister, who reads this often. I'm glad you're checking this and it encourages me to keep writing. I love you, and I'm sad you aren't here for this Christmas. It won't be the same without you.)
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Friends By Default
Remember those friends that you were friends with during grade school, on through junior high, and then graduated high school with? You were convinced that they understood you the best because they had been through everything with you - the crush you had on the hot guy in class, the concert in which you cried your eyes out, the awful teachers you suffered through together. No one could compare to that hometown friend who had been through thick and thin of your high school career, right? Even though you were going to separate colleges, that friend is the one you knew to call at 3 a.m. to get you through a sticky situation. You knew you had an inseparable bond. ...But what about those who get over that nostalgic feeling of "you were always there for me in the past" and decide to renovate the friends in their current career/life/situation?
Once heading off to college, I actually assumed that I would speak to five people from high school. Not because I wanted to avoid the people I graduated with, but more because I figured they would not apply to my life anymore. Boy, was I wrong about that assumption. My hometown friends have kept in touch with me for the most part through my college years - Friends I, for sure, would lose touch with now are some of my best of friends.
Though I had this lucky experience, a friend and I were discussing the idea of being a "friend by default," which in other words means "Our families both decided to raise us in this city. We took all the same classes, knew the same circle of friends, and we even hung out on the weekends together." -- That is the staple to most "best friend forever" scenarios in high school, but was that friendship meant to be? Are we only hanging out with these people because they were around, or because they actually completed us? Or perhaps they completed us at the time, during the high school years, but now that light has faded as you no longer live in the same city, nor take the same classes together, nor hang out together on the weekends.
As the holidays are upon us, we (for the most part) are gathering back in our hometowns to see those old buddies from high school. We'll reminisce on good times together, laughing at the moments that made us cry, which now have become such petty memories. Although this overbearing sense of gathering around and telling tales of the past will hit you, remember that people may have no need to be in your future. Just because friends were "total BFFs" in high school does not mean that you need to see each other at every break.
After graduating from college, most of the other college students you have will perhaps become "friends by default" because you had one thing in common (location). Those friends from high school will become even deeper "friends by default" because you will no longer have a reason to come home (nor the funds to get there).
Are you a friend by default? Remember that if you have to "catch up" with someone's life once seeing them in the supermarket, perhaps there's a reason why you don't already know what's going on in their life. Some of my best friends now were, at one point in my life, friends by default... but some of my best friends then are long gone - because those commonalities no longer exist. There's no shame in that. There's a reason why they did not make it to your future.
Just something to think about. :)
Once heading off to college, I actually assumed that I would speak to five people from high school. Not because I wanted to avoid the people I graduated with, but more because I figured they would not apply to my life anymore. Boy, was I wrong about that assumption. My hometown friends have kept in touch with me for the most part through my college years - Friends I, for sure, would lose touch with now are some of my best of friends.
Though I had this lucky experience, a friend and I were discussing the idea of being a "friend by default," which in other words means "Our families both decided to raise us in this city. We took all the same classes, knew the same circle of friends, and we even hung out on the weekends together." -- That is the staple to most "best friend forever" scenarios in high school, but was that friendship meant to be? Are we only hanging out with these people because they were around, or because they actually completed us? Or perhaps they completed us at the time, during the high school years, but now that light has faded as you no longer live in the same city, nor take the same classes together, nor hang out together on the weekends.
As the holidays are upon us, we (for the most part) are gathering back in our hometowns to see those old buddies from high school. We'll reminisce on good times together, laughing at the moments that made us cry, which now have become such petty memories. Although this overbearing sense of gathering around and telling tales of the past will hit you, remember that people may have no need to be in your future. Just because friends were "total BFFs" in high school does not mean that you need to see each other at every break.
After graduating from college, most of the other college students you have will perhaps become "friends by default" because you had one thing in common (location). Those friends from high school will become even deeper "friends by default" because you will no longer have a reason to come home (nor the funds to get there).
Are you a friend by default? Remember that if you have to "catch up" with someone's life once seeing them in the supermarket, perhaps there's a reason why you don't already know what's going on in their life. Some of my best friends now were, at one point in my life, friends by default... but some of my best friends then are long gone - because those commonalities no longer exist. There's no shame in that. There's a reason why they did not make it to your future.
Just something to think about. :)
Friday, December 18, 2009
Blunt
My mom informed me today, after asking her, that they're putting our house on the market after the first of the year. They hope to sell it in early spring, and to move into another house by summer of next year. There goes the house I grew up in, but I am not necessarily upset over this newly acquired information. It was an inevitability, so I suppose I should deal with it. There's nothing for me to be sad about, and it's just a fact that my parents do not need 4 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms anymore.
The only thing that kind of bugs me is that they're moving to a more expensive neighborhood for no reason. They could purchase a small condo and relish in the small square footage, but instead they're scaling back from a 4-bedroom house to a 3-bedroom. Is that really that much of a difference?
I suppose it's my parents' money, and they can do with it as they choose, but it is a shock to hear that they're moving this quickly. This Christmas will be the last in this house, it looks like. And so it goes...
The only thing that kind of bugs me is that they're moving to a more expensive neighborhood for no reason. They could purchase a small condo and relish in the small square footage, but instead they're scaling back from a 4-bedroom house to a 3-bedroom. Is that really that much of a difference?
I suppose it's my parents' money, and they can do with it as they choose, but it is a shock to hear that they're moving this quickly. This Christmas will be the last in this house, it looks like. And so it goes...
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Downsizing
I am the youngest of three children, and since I have been out of the house for the past three years at college, my parents are now seriously considering downsizing from our 4-bedroom house to something smaller for just the two of them. My mom looks at property on the internet all the time, but who knows where or when they will officially put the house on the market. My parents keep making upgrades to the house - painting walls so they're more "family friendly;" taking out old shower glass windows and replacing them with new curtains; selling old things we never use (i.e. my drum set). It's a lot of minor changes that are making the house I grew up in take on a different light.
My bedroom no longer feels like my bedroom. It has little things all around the room that are mine, but I kind of forget how it felt to have it be "my room." It doesn't have any sense of ownership to it any longer. I feel more connected to the family room than I do to my bedroom. It's almost hard to sleep in that room, as it feels (and is) cold and detached.
Some things never change: the couch is always in the same place, the same Christmas lights are up on the outside of the house... but this year, it feels as though there is less 'stuff' around the house. No more material memories of the three busy children running around the house, and now there are only simple, hidden reminders of my past.
After this post is published, I will be downsizing my own room - Finding pictures and pieces of paper that used to mean so much to me, and now I have to find a final resting place for them. As much as I don't want to be bogged down in meaningless 'stuff,' I still think some memories are worth holding on to. We'll see what I end up with... but a big trash bag is accompanying me upstairs, where most of my meaningless 'stuff' will meet its end.
My bedroom no longer feels like my bedroom. It has little things all around the room that are mine, but I kind of forget how it felt to have it be "my room." It doesn't have any sense of ownership to it any longer. I feel more connected to the family room than I do to my bedroom. It's almost hard to sleep in that room, as it feels (and is) cold and detached.
Some things never change: the couch is always in the same place, the same Christmas lights are up on the outside of the house... but this year, it feels as though there is less 'stuff' around the house. No more material memories of the three busy children running around the house, and now there are only simple, hidden reminders of my past.
After this post is published, I will be downsizing my own room - Finding pictures and pieces of paper that used to mean so much to me, and now I have to find a final resting place for them. As much as I don't want to be bogged down in meaningless 'stuff,' I still think some memories are worth holding on to. We'll see what I end up with... but a big trash bag is accompanying me upstairs, where most of my meaningless 'stuff' will meet its end.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Mulling It Over
After writing my last post, the thoughts of who I used to be could not get out of my head. I was reminded of my former, more immature self last night, when a friend got into a weird predicament. She was not dealing with a situation in the best way, and I realized that I saw a lot of myself in her.
My youth pastor used to tell the upperclassmen in high school that we need to leave a legacy, and to raise a younger student up to replace you after you're gone. With that idea in tow, I see who my friend now could be, and it hurts that she has to go through stupid decisions in order to be better. Like I said, I see a lot of myself in her, and I don't want her to necessarily become like me, but I see so many immature actions and ideas that I used to think or feel. Knowing that I have gone through them and grown through the experiences, I want her to just go ahead and grow up.
In my grade, I am on the older side, and she is on the younger side - that really does not shock me, because you can just tell she has a lot of ideas to sort through about herself before she is successful. She has that idealistic thought process of "I can take over the world" that I once had. Not to say that my dreams are dying, but we cannot all wish to make it big during college or soon there after. Since going to college, I know that I am going to start at the bottom of the totem pole once I graduate...and I'm okay with that. I know I want to do great things in the future, but I also know that most journalists hit their peak around their 30th birthday. I cannot expect to become huge in the eyes of journalists at age 22. It's just not an idea that I wish to hold on to, because it is very unlikely.
I am trying to learn how to build my friend up without saying "You're being foolish, and I used to be the same way." - I don't want to put myself on a pedestal and her feel like she's a little kid. But in time, in time... she'll learn. I know she will.
My youth pastor used to tell the upperclassmen in high school that we need to leave a legacy, and to raise a younger student up to replace you after you're gone. With that idea in tow, I see who my friend now could be, and it hurts that she has to go through stupid decisions in order to be better. Like I said, I see a lot of myself in her, and I don't want her to necessarily become like me, but I see so many immature actions and ideas that I used to think or feel. Knowing that I have gone through them and grown through the experiences, I want her to just go ahead and grow up.
In my grade, I am on the older side, and she is on the younger side - that really does not shock me, because you can just tell she has a lot of ideas to sort through about herself before she is successful. She has that idealistic thought process of "I can take over the world" that I once had. Not to say that my dreams are dying, but we cannot all wish to make it big during college or soon there after. Since going to college, I know that I am going to start at the bottom of the totem pole once I graduate...and I'm okay with that. I know I want to do great things in the future, but I also know that most journalists hit their peak around their 30th birthday. I cannot expect to become huge in the eyes of journalists at age 22. It's just not an idea that I wish to hold on to, because it is very unlikely.
I am trying to learn how to build my friend up without saying "You're being foolish, and I used to be the same way." - I don't want to put myself on a pedestal and her feel like she's a little kid. But in time, in time... she'll learn. I know she will.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
The Freshman
The other day, my roommate and I discussed how we have changed since freshman year. For my roommate, I could tell her changes were obvious: She's way more outgoing, she's branched out of her friend group, and she has even dealt with her first boy catastrophe. Looking at myself, I wonder how I have changed from moving in freshman year to now.
My sense of humor is basically the same. My taste in music hasn't really changed. My fashion sense has definitely changed a lot, and I think that is due to the environment I have been in. At Liberty, girls dress to impress all the time. I feel like at Liberty, you either dress extremely nice or you dress like a scrub. I have refined my sense of style and I know how to wear makeup and wear my hair nice every day. That has been a struggle for my mom for years... considering I didn't own a hair dryer until college. :)
I would say my political views have changed a bit - I would not say I'm a liberal, but I am definitely more liberal than I used to be. Coming into college, I would say I was conservative in religion and politics, when now I think there are a lot of positives on the Left that I had never considered or thought about before.
There are probably scores of other things that have changed about me since entering college, but I'm trying to listen to other people before making my own hazy conclusions. My friend group has changed, my faith has grown, my style has improved...but it's important to reflect on the growth that has occurred in the past three years of my life, now transgressing to senior year.
"You're definitely now a huge boozer." - My roommate. Totally false. :)
My sense of humor is basically the same. My taste in music hasn't really changed. My fashion sense has definitely changed a lot, and I think that is due to the environment I have been in. At Liberty, girls dress to impress all the time. I feel like at Liberty, you either dress extremely nice or you dress like a scrub. I have refined my sense of style and I know how to wear makeup and wear my hair nice every day. That has been a struggle for my mom for years... considering I didn't own a hair dryer until college. :)
I would say my political views have changed a bit - I would not say I'm a liberal, but I am definitely more liberal than I used to be. Coming into college, I would say I was conservative in religion and politics, when now I think there are a lot of positives on the Left that I had never considered or thought about before.
There are probably scores of other things that have changed about me since entering college, but I'm trying to listen to other people before making my own hazy conclusions. My friend group has changed, my faith has grown, my style has improved...but it's important to reflect on the growth that has occurred in the past three years of my life, now transgressing to senior year.
"You're definitely now a huge boozer." - My roommate. Totally false. :)
Fail.
I haven't been blogging...but finals have gotten in the way. ha
I'm off to mail a gift to my sister! :)
I'll blog probably later tonight or tomorrow!
I'm off to mail a gift to my sister! :)
I'll blog probably later tonight or tomorrow!
Sunday, December 13, 2009
I was thinkin'/ overthinkinggg
Because it's finals week, my brain is fried. And although I want to blog every day, I don't have any material for today. So I'm going to just say study hard, "finish strong," as my mother would say, and see you on the flip side.
3 finals, 3 days. I can do it. :)
3 finals, 3 days. I can do it. :)
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Capital Punishment?
My friend, Katie, and I have been tossing the capital punishment debate back and forth for about a month now. It all started when I met her parents, and somehow we got into a heated discussion over which was right. As Christians, we should believe that all life is precious and everyone has a right to life, but at the same time, I argue that we as taxpayers should not be paying for prisoners to be staying in a reasonably comfortable environment for the rest of their days.
Since this topic has many angles, and since Katie is studying for finals with me tonight, I decided it would be fun to do a dual blogging post tonight, of me presenting my thoughts, and her presenting her own. I don't think there will ever necessarily be "common ground" between us and our ideals, but it is important to see both sides. My grandmother sent me a card once that said "When you are speaking, you are saying what you already know. When you are listening, you learn something new."
So here's my position: I do think that life is precious, but have you ever looked into the prison issue in America? Not only are jails crowded, but we are paying for people to stay in an environment that provides shelter, 3 square meals, bathrooms, access to magazines, books, and newspapers, and overall clean upkeep. This type of environment is traditionally better than most environments prison mates can find "on the outside." Although it seems inhumane, I don't see what positive outcome there is for keeping someone alive, especially if the prison mate is receiving a sentence that sets them in jail for life. Why keep feeding these people and providing space for criminals who will be serving out the rest of their days in jail? It's not that I want to disrespect these people by saying "they should die," but it is more a practical reason for our taxpayers' money and for jail space that is currently available. Especially when we do not know what is happening with the prisoners at Guantanamo Bay, our prisons will be even more crowded.
If anyone would like more information on the jail system, "Super Size Me" writer and director Morgan Spurlock spent 28 days in jail for his FX show, "30 Days." The documentary-style reality show gives statistics about the prison system and the reality of prison mates (and those who find themselves back in the system). One of his roommates while in jail was able to be released, and found himself in jail three months later. Although while in jail, the roommate said "I will never back in jail again," he repeated his offense in the real world. Also, MTV's documentary show "True Life: I'm Getting Out Of Prison" shows how hard it is to get back into the real world after spending time in prison. It is important to see what the realities of going to prison are, and once again, ignorance is not an excuse. I find that one should not just argue about a position unless they have evidence or experience to back it up. Everyone has an opinion about the right to life, but an opinion out of ignorance is not acceptable.
Katie, take it away: Abby put me on the spot but here goes. As a believer, I believe that all life is sacred. I cannot say I am pro-life in one breath and in the next voice my support of capital punishment. That would be a contradiction and therefore hypocritical. It might seem as if killing prisoners saves tax payer's money, however once you add up the outrageous legal fees from all of their appeals plus the money you are spending to keep them in prison the cost skyrockets.
What it all boils down to is the value of human life. Often we forget prisoners are people. People make mistakes. Who are we to say who lives and who deserves to die? Life is such a precious gift, how dare we try and take it from another?
Again, this is not saying that one side is wrong or right, but discussing both sides is essential to a well-rounded view on the topic. Please, give me your opinion as well. I want to hear what I or Katie have overlooked and if there is a definitive answer as to which one is right. Is there no gray area on the topic of capital punishment?
Since this topic has many angles, and since Katie is studying for finals with me tonight, I decided it would be fun to do a dual blogging post tonight, of me presenting my thoughts, and her presenting her own. I don't think there will ever necessarily be "common ground" between us and our ideals, but it is important to see both sides. My grandmother sent me a card once that said "When you are speaking, you are saying what you already know. When you are listening, you learn something new."
So here's my position: I do think that life is precious, but have you ever looked into the prison issue in America? Not only are jails crowded, but we are paying for people to stay in an environment that provides shelter, 3 square meals, bathrooms, access to magazines, books, and newspapers, and overall clean upkeep. This type of environment is traditionally better than most environments prison mates can find "on the outside." Although it seems inhumane, I don't see what positive outcome there is for keeping someone alive, especially if the prison mate is receiving a sentence that sets them in jail for life. Why keep feeding these people and providing space for criminals who will be serving out the rest of their days in jail? It's not that I want to disrespect these people by saying "they should die," but it is more a practical reason for our taxpayers' money and for jail space that is currently available. Especially when we do not know what is happening with the prisoners at Guantanamo Bay, our prisons will be even more crowded.
If anyone would like more information on the jail system, "Super Size Me" writer and director Morgan Spurlock spent 28 days in jail for his FX show, "30 Days." The documentary-style reality show gives statistics about the prison system and the reality of prison mates (and those who find themselves back in the system). One of his roommates while in jail was able to be released, and found himself in jail three months later. Although while in jail, the roommate said "I will never back in jail again," he repeated his offense in the real world. Also, MTV's documentary show "True Life: I'm Getting Out Of Prison" shows how hard it is to get back into the real world after spending time in prison. It is important to see what the realities of going to prison are, and once again, ignorance is not an excuse. I find that one should not just argue about a position unless they have evidence or experience to back it up. Everyone has an opinion about the right to life, but an opinion out of ignorance is not acceptable.
Katie, take it away: Abby put me on the spot but here goes. As a believer, I believe that all life is sacred. I cannot say I am pro-life in one breath and in the next voice my support of capital punishment. That would be a contradiction and therefore hypocritical. It might seem as if killing prisoners saves tax payer's money, however once you add up the outrageous legal fees from all of their appeals plus the money you are spending to keep them in prison the cost skyrockets.
What it all boils down to is the value of human life. Often we forget prisoners are people. People make mistakes. Who are we to say who lives and who deserves to die? Life is such a precious gift, how dare we try and take it from another?
Again, this is not saying that one side is wrong or right, but discussing both sides is essential to a well-rounded view on the topic. Please, give me your opinion as well. I want to hear what I or Katie have overlooked and if there is a definitive answer as to which one is right. Is there no gray area on the topic of capital punishment?
Friday, December 11, 2009
Food, Inc.
I've been tossing and turning with the idea of vegetarianism for a couple of years now. Not being able to handle the taste of pork from the beginning, I've completely cut out pig from my diet (yes, that includes bacon). I'm trying to restrict my diet from beef, but there are days that I long for a juicy burger. Only eating poultry and seafood, I would say I'm a flexiterian (those who eat meat from time to time). It was until I watched the new documentary "Food, Inc" that I truly changed my heart on eating meat.
"Food, Inc" shared compelling statistics and gruesome reality with the public, and it radically changed my opinion on where I get my food. According to the film, almost all of the meat being farmed in America is ultimately owned by five major corporations. The companies have such a high demand for certain meat that animals are being genetically changed in order to meet the demands. For instance, chickens have changed in size from generation to generation. Since white meat is the most desired part of the bird, there is now a way to make the breast meat over twice the size of a traditional chicken in half of the amount of time. Because the chickens are growing at such a fast rate, they are no longer able to support their own body weight. Therefore, the chickens stand up to feed themselves, but after a few steps, will topple over and be essentially handicapped.
When visiting local farms, one farmer said his farm was almost shut down due to "health code violations." When the FDA tried to prove the contamination, it showed that the meat cultured from the independent farm harbored approximately 130 different types of contaminants on its meat, but compared to those in the grocery stores, the FDA found over 30,000 contaminants.
The animals are treated inhumanely and as a way to feed the demand, "meat fillers" are mixed in with beef patties across the country. Illegal immigrants are usually the ones who are putting the animals in the factories, and when it is such a disgusting job, they are the only ones who are willing to do it. The police is trying to cut down on illegal workers, but the corporations are truly to blame as they know they are hiring immigrants to do the worst jobs in America.
Buying locally from farmer's markets ensures that your food will be "filler"-free, not to mention have a healthier meat that didn't have to travel thousands of miles to feed you. "Food, Inc" also suggests cutting out meat just once a week to do your part in helping the animals live another day. We should be supporting companies who respect the animals and the people who work for the company, not just a company looking to make it rich. Also, fill up on the simplest substance of life: water. It saves you money and calories, and your body will thank you for it.
I suggest seeing "Food, Inc" if you want to see the food industry's truth. Don't blame ignorance - if you're putting it into your body, shouldn't you know where it came from? And what harm it could potentially do to your body? One story in "Food, Inc" featured a mom who lost her 4-year-old son hemorrhaging due to contaminated meat. The meat wasn't even recalled from the stores until 16 days AFTER her son died. Is eating that Big Mac truly worth it?
"Food, Inc" shared compelling statistics and gruesome reality with the public, and it radically changed my opinion on where I get my food. According to the film, almost all of the meat being farmed in America is ultimately owned by five major corporations. The companies have such a high demand for certain meat that animals are being genetically changed in order to meet the demands. For instance, chickens have changed in size from generation to generation. Since white meat is the most desired part of the bird, there is now a way to make the breast meat over twice the size of a traditional chicken in half of the amount of time. Because the chickens are growing at such a fast rate, they are no longer able to support their own body weight. Therefore, the chickens stand up to feed themselves, but after a few steps, will topple over and be essentially handicapped.
When visiting local farms, one farmer said his farm was almost shut down due to "health code violations." When the FDA tried to prove the contamination, it showed that the meat cultured from the independent farm harbored approximately 130 different types of contaminants on its meat, but compared to those in the grocery stores, the FDA found over 30,000 contaminants.
The animals are treated inhumanely and as a way to feed the demand, "meat fillers" are mixed in with beef patties across the country. Illegal immigrants are usually the ones who are putting the animals in the factories, and when it is such a disgusting job, they are the only ones who are willing to do it. The police is trying to cut down on illegal workers, but the corporations are truly to blame as they know they are hiring immigrants to do the worst jobs in America.
Buying locally from farmer's markets ensures that your food will be "filler"-free, not to mention have a healthier meat that didn't have to travel thousands of miles to feed you. "Food, Inc" also suggests cutting out meat just once a week to do your part in helping the animals live another day. We should be supporting companies who respect the animals and the people who work for the company, not just a company looking to make it rich. Also, fill up on the simplest substance of life: water. It saves you money and calories, and your body will thank you for it.
I suggest seeing "Food, Inc" if you want to see the food industry's truth. Don't blame ignorance - if you're putting it into your body, shouldn't you know where it came from? And what harm it could potentially do to your body? One story in "Food, Inc" featured a mom who lost her 4-year-old son hemorrhaging due to contaminated meat. The meat wasn't even recalled from the stores until 16 days AFTER her son died. Is eating that Big Mac truly worth it?
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Craigslist.
Postponing my studying just a bit longer, I started to browse Craigslist.com to find what people are seeking online. Hilarity ensued. The "Casual Connections" section is my new favorite place to waste time. My city's "personals" tab was as if all of the uneducated misspellers of Lynchburg got together to unite on this site. No lie, one request was for: "i need a hot girl who wants to have a relationship and she must cook. i got a education." -- Yep, they said "I got a education." I shake my head in disgust.
The other slightly amazing thing about Craigslist was how hopeless these people came off as. A lot of the want ads were stories of people not bold enough to talk to another person. Instead, they're taking a huge risk by posting a want ad on Craigslist. How sad it is to not be able to communicate with someone who is sitting just a couple of tables down from someone else. And also, the saddest ad was from a 78-year-old man. He was seeking a companion to go to coffee, see a movie, go on a walk every once in a while because he is now divorced. He said he was an up-front guy, but just didn't have any way to meet new people. He didn't want to go out "too often" but just wanted friendship. He enclosed pictures of himself in the ad. Putting a face with the heartbreakingly-truthful ad made it even harder to read.
Does this Craigslist system work? Is that the only way to make up for lost time instead of waiting to casually meet someone on one's own time? I suppose Craigslist is one way to do it, but it seems pretty hopeless and pathetic. Especially for those who cannot spell. No, sir, I will not "halla" at you on Facebook because you are 27 and cannot spell "holla" correctly, which in itself is not even a word to begin with.
Oh, brother.
The other slightly amazing thing about Craigslist was how hopeless these people came off as. A lot of the want ads were stories of people not bold enough to talk to another person. Instead, they're taking a huge risk by posting a want ad on Craigslist. How sad it is to not be able to communicate with someone who is sitting just a couple of tables down from someone else. And also, the saddest ad was from a 78-year-old man. He was seeking a companion to go to coffee, see a movie, go on a walk every once in a while because he is now divorced. He said he was an up-front guy, but just didn't have any way to meet new people. He didn't want to go out "too often" but just wanted friendship. He enclosed pictures of himself in the ad. Putting a face with the heartbreakingly-truthful ad made it even harder to read.
Does this Craigslist system work? Is that the only way to make up for lost time instead of waiting to casually meet someone on one's own time? I suppose Craigslist is one way to do it, but it seems pretty hopeless and pathetic. Especially for those who cannot spell. No, sir, I will not "halla" at you on Facebook because you are 27 and cannot spell "holla" correctly, which in itself is not even a word to begin with.
Oh, brother.
Big Green Tractor
I know this is going to turn some people off (especially my roommates) but I am not a fan of country music. Today, my roommates and I were in the car when "Big Green Tractor" came on which says, "Climb up in my lap and drive if you want to/ Girl, you know you got me to hold on to/ We can go to town, but baby if you'd rather/ I'll take you for a ride on my big green tractor."
I'm sorry, but what is the allure of riding on a big green tractor? I'm not hating on the John Deere fans, nor am I saying that all country music is bad, but really: that song? The story is that a girl is all dressed up when she comes to her boyfriend's house, and instead of going out to a party or to a restaurant, they'll just sit together on his big green tractor. Who in the right mind chooses a tractor over going out on the town? Especially when the girl has taken the time to doll herself up and look nice!
It just reaffirms all of the bad country songs I don't understand. Someone, please, explain to me why riding on a tractor would be a romantic gesture on any level. To me, the romance is lost in something so hillbilly as that. It is simply like saying "I don't want to spend the money on you, honey, but I will waste the gas in my tractor! Not only will you smell like gasoline, but you'll have grass stains on your dress too!"
- How romantic. <3>
I'm sorry, but what is the allure of riding on a big green tractor? I'm not hating on the John Deere fans, nor am I saying that all country music is bad, but really: that song? The story is that a girl is all dressed up when she comes to her boyfriend's house, and instead of going out to a party or to a restaurant, they'll just sit together on his big green tractor. Who in the right mind chooses a tractor over going out on the town? Especially when the girl has taken the time to doll herself up and look nice!
It just reaffirms all of the bad country songs I don't understand. Someone, please, explain to me why riding on a tractor would be a romantic gesture on any level. To me, the romance is lost in something so hillbilly as that. It is simply like saying "I don't want to spend the money on you, honey, but I will waste the gas in my tractor! Not only will you smell like gasoline, but you'll have grass stains on your dress too!"
- How romantic. <3>
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Crafty.
There are days in which I feel like my calling is doing something crafty such as scrapbooking or glamming up picture frames. You know, those little trinkets that girls really appreciate if they get them for a gift, because they're hand-made and have a personal touch. Today was one of those days. I didn't intend on being crafty, as I had a massive chemistry test (and another one on Friday, along with a History final).
My sister just got married in August, and I had many pictures placed on my desk of the wedding. The pictures were wonderful, but I didn't have anywhere to put them - that's where Target came in. Strolling through the picture frame aisle, I found a wonderful six-picture collage that was perfect for the photos. After buying the frame, I transformed my desk all around so that my top shelf was simply a photo rack - It now displays four different picture frames or collages filled with family and friends.
Seeing the pictures make me happy - Not only am I reminded of my dear friends, but also improve the aesthetics of the room. Pictures are always that one thing I would save if a fire broke out in my home. Those are something no one can replace, and are literally priceless. No one can recreate those moments, and more importantly they show where you've been and with whom.
Now if only I can store the crafty energy to help clean the rest of my desk, which now looks like disaster struck... :)
My sister just got married in August, and I had many pictures placed on my desk of the wedding. The pictures were wonderful, but I didn't have anywhere to put them - that's where Target came in. Strolling through the picture frame aisle, I found a wonderful six-picture collage that was perfect for the photos. After buying the frame, I transformed my desk all around so that my top shelf was simply a photo rack - It now displays four different picture frames or collages filled with family and friends.
Seeing the pictures make me happy - Not only am I reminded of my dear friends, but also improve the aesthetics of the room. Pictures are always that one thing I would save if a fire broke out in my home. Those are something no one can replace, and are literally priceless. No one can recreate those moments, and more importantly they show where you've been and with whom.
Now if only I can store the crafty energy to help clean the rest of my desk, which now looks like disaster struck... :)
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Christmas Songs
Traditionally, I am not the first to bust out the Christmas albums the day after Thanksgiving. Christmas music has a small place in my heart for the hours in which I am caroling (or others are caroling to me). This year, for whatever reason, I have been filled with the Christmas cheer and been wanting to sing Christmas carols all day. Is this a sign of aging? Christmas carols, I have realized, are extremely sweet. Have you ever looked at the lyrics? I am in love with the lyrics for "Let It Snow." They make me want to snuggle up next to someone on a couch, with blankets, warm coffee, and a fire roaring. Who could resist the verse "When we finally kiss goodnight, How I'll hate going out in the storm! But if you'll really hold me tight, All the way home I'll be warm."
Something picturesque recently happened to me while listening to Christmas music. Sunday afternoon, my roommate and I listened to Christmas music while we studied our separate subjects. Even though we were doing our own thing, we both randomly belted out sections of the songs. I can't describe why that put joy in my heart, but it did. We were both more positive and hopeful for the near future, when we'd be in our hometowns with friends and family.
There is just something about Bing Crosby singing "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" that makes me feel 5-years-old again, anxiously awaiting Christmas morning. The next time you throw on Pandora, click one of their special Holiday mixes, and sing yourself into the past with the wonderful lyrics and tunes.
Something picturesque recently happened to me while listening to Christmas music. Sunday afternoon, my roommate and I listened to Christmas music while we studied our separate subjects. Even though we were doing our own thing, we both randomly belted out sections of the songs. I can't describe why that put joy in my heart, but it did. We were both more positive and hopeful for the near future, when we'd be in our hometowns with friends and family.
There is just something about Bing Crosby singing "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" that makes me feel 5-years-old again, anxiously awaiting Christmas morning. The next time you throw on Pandora, click one of their special Holiday mixes, and sing yourself into the past with the wonderful lyrics and tunes.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Hedonism Rears Its Ugly Head
There are some days where I wake up and feel like it's going to happen. Those days in which I know, I know that tonight, I'm going to mess up. It's unavoidable. I get a heavy pit in my stomach until I accomplish what I knew I would do.
It's never something I'm proud of. I'm always ashamed as soon as it's over with. And yet, I can't distract my mind from doing it. It comes in such a strong wave of persistence that I cannot dodge. I could say that I don't even want to do it, but at this point, I'd say I still want to. There is a little, little voice inside of me that wants to. It's the voice that makes me want to have fun and be young and not care about long-term consequences.
I know that before I rest tonight, it will be done. I knew it would happen, and it shall. As much as it shouldn't, it will.
Ironically, I decided to read Psalm 32:3. "When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long."
I haven't felt more sick in months.
It's never something I'm proud of. I'm always ashamed as soon as it's over with. And yet, I can't distract my mind from doing it. It comes in such a strong wave of persistence that I cannot dodge. I could say that I don't even want to do it, but at this point, I'd say I still want to. There is a little, little voice inside of me that wants to. It's the voice that makes me want to have fun and be young and not care about long-term consequences.
I know that before I rest tonight, it will be done. I knew it would happen, and it shall. As much as it shouldn't, it will.
Ironically, I decided to read Psalm 32:3. "When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long."
I haven't felt more sick in months.
Bruised
I'm not going to pretend that I am a genius at the concept of love. I have been taught how to love, and I have experienced glimpses of true love before, but I can't say that I have felt it for myself (in human interaction. Excluding God, Jesus, the Easter Bunny, etc...).
I used to think I was really smart in the department of love. I knew what to say to guys and why. I knew what things to wear, or what conversations to start. Now I have realized that I am clueless. Having been single for three years now, I learned that clearly I don't have love figured out yet, or else I'd be happily in a relationship. Or at least in a relationship, period.
Yesterday, a friend said to me, "If Holly Madison (Hugh Hefner's former girlfriend) can't find a man, there is no hope." Madison is beautiful, successful, ambitious, and overall a kind person. She has found temporary love since Hef (if we want to call that love), but nothing substantial. In her new E! Television Network show, "Holly's World," she is seen throwing herself at a fellow man she sees often. And to tell you the truth, I see why she does it. It's extremely lonely being single. As much as I have learned a lot about myself in these past three years, there are a lot of low points in which surrounding yourself with friends or going on a date does not heal that wound. The missing aspect is having someone love you for your best, your worst, and your ugliest. Someone who chooses to be with you because they adore your personality and all of the little quirks that come with it. They choose to love your family because you love them. It is such a rarity to find that person who sees you imperfectly yet desires to be with you. Strive for that kind of love, instead of merely someone who fills your time.
Love is such a complicated emotion and, at the end of the day, it is a verb. Love is a verb. For instance, my other roommate is making dinner for a friend who is going through a rough situation. She's not doing it to make herself look better, but rather to comfort a friend who is battling something difficult. I see love in my father, who plows streets covered with snow so that people don't have to shovel their sidewalks. He delivers snacks and treats as a "thank you" to friends who help us out from time to time. I even see love in the directors of movies, as you know they over-analyze every frame and scene to make the film its best. One of my best friends always has creative gift ideas for Christmas and birthdays that hit the nail on the head. She personalizes the gifts so well and you know they touch a certain place in your heart and soul that is only reserved for love.
Listening to David Berkeley's "The Confluence," he says: "She could make me love her in a single breath. I would fall a thousand times." - I wish I had that power. How simple that would be.
Instead, love to me seems like a concept in a song by the Bens: "Love just leaves you bruised."
I used to think I was really smart in the department of love. I knew what to say to guys and why. I knew what things to wear, or what conversations to start. Now I have realized that I am clueless. Having been single for three years now, I learned that clearly I don't have love figured out yet, or else I'd be happily in a relationship. Or at least in a relationship, period.
Yesterday, a friend said to me, "If Holly Madison (Hugh Hefner's former girlfriend) can't find a man, there is no hope." Madison is beautiful, successful, ambitious, and overall a kind person. She has found temporary love since Hef (if we want to call that love), but nothing substantial. In her new E! Television Network show, "Holly's World," she is seen throwing herself at a fellow man she sees often. And to tell you the truth, I see why she does it. It's extremely lonely being single. As much as I have learned a lot about myself in these past three years, there are a lot of low points in which surrounding yourself with friends or going on a date does not heal that wound. The missing aspect is having someone love you for your best, your worst, and your ugliest. Someone who chooses to be with you because they adore your personality and all of the little quirks that come with it. They choose to love your family because you love them. It is such a rarity to find that person who sees you imperfectly yet desires to be with you. Strive for that kind of love, instead of merely someone who fills your time.
Love is such a complicated emotion and, at the end of the day, it is a verb. Love is a verb. For instance, my other roommate is making dinner for a friend who is going through a rough situation. She's not doing it to make herself look better, but rather to comfort a friend who is battling something difficult. I see love in my father, who plows streets covered with snow so that people don't have to shovel their sidewalks. He delivers snacks and treats as a "thank you" to friends who help us out from time to time. I even see love in the directors of movies, as you know they over-analyze every frame and scene to make the film its best. One of my best friends always has creative gift ideas for Christmas and birthdays that hit the nail on the head. She personalizes the gifts so well and you know they touch a certain place in your heart and soul that is only reserved for love.
Listening to David Berkeley's "The Confluence," he says: "She could make me love her in a single breath. I would fall a thousand times." - I wish I had that power. How simple that would be.
Instead, love to me seems like a concept in a song by the Bens: "Love just leaves you bruised."
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Guess what I found?
So, there I was: looking at my cluttered desk, in the middle of a homework session, and decided that it was time to clean. I put papers neatly into organized piles; I threw away trash thrown around the desk. As I was uncovering one massive pile of newspapers, I found something so tiny, and yet so precious: my Bible. I don't think I have seen that ol' thing in a good two months, which means: a) I haven't been reading my Bible. b) I haven't been going to church. c) I haven't bothered to look at my Bible, nor miss it. d) All of the above. Clearly, my life has not been guided spiritually in a long, long time, and quite frankly, I was okay with that until today.
Let me back up. A little background on me and my situation: My name is Abby, I'm a Print Journalism major with a minor in Intercultural Studies, and I go to Liberty University. For those of you who don't know, that's the school founded by Jerry Falwell (noted televangelist and beyond outspoken on everything) and it is the largest evangelical university in the world. We have 12,000 students on campus and an impressive 38,000 online. My school is famous for its rules, like the fact that we cannot see rated R movies or drink alcohol even if we're 21. Oh, and having an abortion will make you on academic expulsion (not to mention paying $500 to the school). The school has its ups and downs, and I'll be honest with you - I wanted to transfer from Liberty last year. But more on that later... Point is, I'm a journalism student and I cannot wait to graduate.
Back to my Bible. This is going to sound weird, but I love to sit around and just read chapters from the Bible. For fun. Not necessarily on a spiritual journey or to find the answers God has hidden for me in some obscure verse, but just to read it. It's like reading any other kind of book for pleasure. And lately, I've ignored my Bible even though I usually feel joyful after reading a short verse, paragraph, chapter. My goal is to kind of work my way back into reading the Bible for pleasure, without schoolwork bringing me down (as it always does... You've got to love finals preparation). This is kind of an experiment to see what I can accomplish on my own, and whether I make time for my Bible or not. I'm sure God would love it if I did. I can hear Him chuckling at me now, or at least I hope God thinks I'm funny.
Since I already started my blog out with a little story about my Bible, you probably assume I'm some goodie two-shoes who devotes her daily life to God and preaching the Gospel to the ends of the earth. I almost wish that were true. Instead of walking next to God, I have been merely about a mile away from God this past year, following the bread crumbs He's been leaving behind for me. I know what He wants from me, and what He asks of me, but have decided I just want to figure things out. I suppose that's the typical college student's dilemma - figuring out who you are, or who you're supposed to be. Anyhow, I think I share a unique experience: I go to a Christian school, sing the Christian songs, and live with Christian people. That's not the unique aspect. The uniqueness of my situation is the fact that I am kind of pushing my Bible aside, so I can be a bit hedonistic at times. (And oh, how my youth pastor would cringe.)
These are my struggles with God, careers, schooling, etc. Hopefully someone can glean a different worldview or life lesson from my experiences. Enjoy my embarrassments and hard truths - I prepare to lay them on the line, just for strangers on the Internet to read. :)
Let me back up. A little background on me and my situation: My name is Abby, I'm a Print Journalism major with a minor in Intercultural Studies, and I go to Liberty University. For those of you who don't know, that's the school founded by Jerry Falwell (noted televangelist and beyond outspoken on everything) and it is the largest evangelical university in the world. We have 12,000 students on campus and an impressive 38,000 online. My school is famous for its rules, like the fact that we cannot see rated R movies or drink alcohol even if we're 21. Oh, and having an abortion will make you on academic expulsion (not to mention paying $500 to the school). The school has its ups and downs, and I'll be honest with you - I wanted to transfer from Liberty last year. But more on that later... Point is, I'm a journalism student and I cannot wait to graduate.
Back to my Bible. This is going to sound weird, but I love to sit around and just read chapters from the Bible. For fun. Not necessarily on a spiritual journey or to find the answers God has hidden for me in some obscure verse, but just to read it. It's like reading any other kind of book for pleasure. And lately, I've ignored my Bible even though I usually feel joyful after reading a short verse, paragraph, chapter. My goal is to kind of work my way back into reading the Bible for pleasure, without schoolwork bringing me down (as it always does... You've got to love finals preparation). This is kind of an experiment to see what I can accomplish on my own, and whether I make time for my Bible or not. I'm sure God would love it if I did. I can hear Him chuckling at me now, or at least I hope God thinks I'm funny.
Since I already started my blog out with a little story about my Bible, you probably assume I'm some goodie two-shoes who devotes her daily life to God and preaching the Gospel to the ends of the earth. I almost wish that were true. Instead of walking next to God, I have been merely about a mile away from God this past year, following the bread crumbs He's been leaving behind for me. I know what He wants from me, and what He asks of me, but have decided I just want to figure things out. I suppose that's the typical college student's dilemma - figuring out who you are, or who you're supposed to be. Anyhow, I think I share a unique experience: I go to a Christian school, sing the Christian songs, and live with Christian people. That's not the unique aspect. The uniqueness of my situation is the fact that I am kind of pushing my Bible aside, so I can be a bit hedonistic at times. (And oh, how my youth pastor would cringe.)
These are my struggles with God, careers, schooling, etc. Hopefully someone can glean a different worldview or life lesson from my experiences. Enjoy my embarrassments and hard truths - I prepare to lay them on the line, just for strangers on the Internet to read. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)